Taking theatre etiquette to a whole new level – literally taking the piss

A bug bear of many regular theatre-goers is theatre etiquette. Being well behaved at the theatre is incredibly important, not only so that people can absorb themselves in the piece they are watching, without distraction but also because ticket prices can be so expensive and when paying hard earned money for a night out, people deserve to enjoy it without distraction. You can read my previous ‘Theatre Etiquette Tips’ blog here.

Sadly, many people don’t see this point of view and happily chomp their way through noisy packets of crisps or popcorn, discuss the show in great detail with their friends (during the performance) and most annoyingly of all, sit there on their mobile phones, scrolling through Facebook without a care in the world.

Last year, I went to see a performance of Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown and sat next to me in the front row were a drunk couple who decided to ‘fornicate’ during the show. This led to an Usher having to ask them to refrain from what they were doing as the actors had complained of being distracted by it during the interval.

I often think i’ve seen it all and heard all the possible horror stories you could think of. But today I have been proved wrong, once again. At a performance of Alright Bitches!, a new comedy play at the Above The Stag Theatre in Vauxhall (the UK’s only full time LGBT Theatre) last night, audience members witnessed a man urinate into an empty wine glass, during the performance! Literally taking the piss.

What is the world coming to where we think this is acceptable behaviour? The Above The Stag Theatre is a very intimate space and no where in the theatre is particularly dark, so how this man had the audacity to do this I can not fathom. Alright Bitches! isn’t even a long play (less than two hours, including a twenty minute interval) and so if you can’t hold your bladder for that long then sit near to the exit so that you can quietly leave, should you need to, during the performance. Don’t just throw back your glass of wine and do your business in it. I know dogs who are better behaved!


Take a look at stars of the West End talking about what annoys them when they are at the theatre…